Clockwork

The form of caress that gently follows,

My inner demons that feels so hollow.

I cannot address what speaks to me,

What has been and will always be,

A sight to remember.

It strokes in a way that I do not know,

Like seasons it changes to and fro.

“How do you feel like now” I ask,

“What has happened in the past?”

I do not know.

It slyly turns into subtle madness,

Changing again to rushed sadness.

Even when I begin to see,

Hope that is momentary,

It feels dim.

The heat builds up and does not go,

There is a side that I cannot show.

For it needs to be built up in me,

And in time I will reveal,

It’s clockwork.

And then June makes its way,

Extending summer to another day.

“Winter will come soon though”

“Autumn isn’t really far you know”

I pledge.

With made up memories in my mind,

That speak to me all the time.

I feel sorrow in what I shouldn’t have done,

And look back at how far I had come,

I feel regret.

With open windows on my wall,

In the heated summer I call.

To all those who have been close to me,

Who see the life the way I see,

With remorse.

And in my book I’ll soon write down,

A symbolic passage of what I’m bound.

And I’m going to leave it there and then,

For weeks to come and weeks to spend,

With delight.

Until I find a reason to rise,

That I no longer need despise.

That I no longer have to run,

That I have fears to overcome,

For good.

And winter flashes back through those days,

And brings back good in many ways.

“But June has gone and May will stay”

“Where will you go now” I say,

I’m stuck.

And with those emotions in my mind,

I will have to forgive myself this time.

That what I have done cannot be undone,

And will have to accept what I have become,

With forgiveness.

And the clockwork slowly begins to reveal,

A quiet, gentle side of me.

That was before and holds on again,

And tells me of what I have been,

Careful.

The seasons cycle on and on,

“With no potential harm? Come on!”

I will truly begin to see,

That I’m not a part of what others can’t be,

A lone survivor.

And now every now and then,

I speak up to the existence within,

That is there acceptance in my mind?

That will everything be fine?

I ponder.

And now weeks and hours alone,

Cannot bring back that tale I know.

And with that I bring to adjust,

An old tale that I must,

See be brought out of the heavens doors,

And left in the open floor,

Of time, need and disgust,

And framed onto the warm walls,

Of forgiveness.

                                                                                (c) Mitul Magu

                                                                                16 July 2016

Dear Richmond

While doing things which I never wanted to,

And when there were no options left for me you,

Stood at a silent distance afar,

Because Richmond I remember,

You were there.

While gazing into the starry night,

Still hoping for the best and ready to fight,

You drained that hope away from me,

Because Richmond I remember,

You were there.

When I was so close to live my dream,

Richmond you showed me the reality,

That I was just as good as anyone else,

Because Richmond I remember,

You were there.

And now I am so far away from you,

With all the things that I learnt from you.

They’re stories now and they were stories then,

Richmond I hope I never see you again,

You’re not something I will soon forget,

Because Richmond I remember,

You were there.

                                                                            (c) Mitul Magu

                                                                             23^rd November 2015

An Epiphany of Greatness

The spider, bending forward

In its subtle clutches of doom

Slithering, chirping and murmuring

As it slides through its closely knit

Palace of no return.

How weary does it look

With its hairy limbs and compound eyes

Lunging out and about

With no fear or any

Form of emotion.

Grasping its victim by the teeth

And spinning the yarn

As it was once taught to

Injecting with venom

And moving free.

With a sudden burst of energy

It spins its many webs

Like filters, for his home

And for protection

Of his many children.

No matter how threatened it gets

It never seems to quit

Or relax or soothe

In its path whatever it sees

Is his, and his to take.

                                                                                           (c) Mitul Magu

                                                                                                              31 October, 2015

Shadow Men

They sneak up to you and then hide,

You take a look, but no ones behind.

Ruthless, viscous, dirty lot,

Always planning their nasty plot.

You run away, fairly quick and far,

But they always know where you are.

From distorted areas of truth and lies,

From the darkest of shades they arise.

As you move around and the time ticks,

Like gangsters, they continue their dirty tricks.

And all you can do is follow them,

And that’s what they want, those shadow men.

Until you do what they want,

For weeks and months they will haunt.

Leaving you in agony, vain,

Suffering which would forever remain.

Even in this helpless plight,

Shadow men seldom strike,

When they’re too close, too near,

Your heart chokes out of fear.

They call you close with filthy names,

And play their sinister mind games.

And in that game you don’t realize,

How much you’ve been traumatized.

They lurk as shady figures on walls,

As you shout back at their calls.

They fill your life with sorrow when,

You come in the way of the shadow men.

Following them will lead you back,

On that same culpable track.

After being chased for so long,

You’ll need to go back where you went wrong.

Go back to each and every,

Who you have cheated deceitfully.

Who you have mislead for your good,

Go back and do what an honest man would.

Do this before your grave gets filled,

For shadow men are nothing but your own guilt.

Who have pity on no one,

Who will make you pay for the wrongs you’ve done.

Deceptive they are, quite impressive,

All to make you more submissive.

But even when they’re not in view,

From where no one’s looking, they stare at you.

Laugh at every breath you take,

Every smile you fake,

Every mistake you make.

And your chances are very narrow when,

You try to run away, away from them,

Away from the shadow men.

                                                                (c) Mitul Magu

                                                                 February, 2011

Blazing Visionaries

In this dreary world I breathe,
And stare down at hell beneath,
I vision, follow, men of fire,
Leaving ashes of desire.

I stop to wonder where the worlds meet,
Or rather ponder where hell really exists,
Of men that could not stand on their feet,
Burning all with their flaming fists.

And now the truth that I know,
I see it everywhere I go,
And imagine it through the world at large,
Sabotage, Sabotage, Sabotage,
What a waste.

                                                                                                                     (c)Mitul Magu, 14
                                                                                                                     (2010)